A Visit to Godshill

If you approach the chocolate box village of Godshill from the Whitwell Road, you’ll clearly see the church as you approach. But once you’re in the tourist heart of the village, the Church disappers from view.

Unless you’re particularly looking out for it, you’re also unlikely to notice the old road south, Sheepwash Lane. This minor road creeps out of the very heart of the village, leading down to the practically named Sheepwash Farm, and to an area that used to be referred to as “Devil’s Acre”, although you won’t see that name mentioned on any map.

The story most often told about the origins of the Church, and how Godshill got its name, goes something like this.

Back in the seventh century, as the old inhabitants of the island were converted to Christianity, the local folk had to decide where their church should be. There had been an old pagan site on top of a nearby hill. If the church were built there, then it would certainly command the landscape; but, as with all these things, there was a but: there was nothing on top of the hill from which you could build a church; so everything that was required would have to be transported up there. By hand. So it would be much more, you might say, “convenient” to build the church down here, on the flat, rather than up there, on the hill.

And so it was, that one fine day, the folk set to, collecting the stones to lay out the foundations.

But when they returned the next morning, their work had been undone… their first attempt at laying the foundations had vanished.

They looked around the field, and… nothing…

No tools, no marker posts, no stones for the foundations.

They searched around the site, then a bit further out, and then…

No? Surely not? It couldn’t be?

Everything that had been in the meadow had been moved to the top of the hill.

So everyone gathered together and rolled the stones back down the hill, and set about building the foundations again.

The next day they came back, and… nothing. They searched around, and about, and… just check the hill: and there again, everything, as it had been, down there, but now, up here.

So they set to and carried everything back down the hill, again, and started again, again.

This was getting to be more than a joke, so a guard was set. As night fell, some say they saw the stones start to jiggle, and roll, and sway, and dance – and it really was as if they were dancing – they danced their way right up the hill. Some say that it was the doing of the fairy folk, come to feast, and finding their meeting space had been converted to a building site, who had rolled and carried and carried and rolled the stones out of their place, and up the hill to another place. Others say it the Devil’s work. Others still that it must have been a miracle, and God’s doing. But whatever happened, whoever’s story you believed, be in no doubt: those stones made their way back up to the top of the hill.

The next morning, as folk turned up to continue working on the foundations — what, again? Everything’s moved, again? — and another meeting was held. And the story was told by those who’d seen the stones moving; but no way had they’d tried to stop them.

So it seemed as if someone, or something, or even the very Church itself, didn’t want the Church to be down here, but instead wanted it to be up there.

And so it was that the Church was built on top of the hill, God’s hill; and the original site, where the Church refused to be built, came to be known as Devil’s Acre. Now, whether that’s because the Devil didn’t like the idea of a Church there, or whether God wanted to keep his Church away from there, or God wanted his Church up there, who can say? But there was surely some magic afoot that night the stones were seen dancing to Godshill.

Island Tellings…

The pseudonymous Abraham Elder’s Tales and Legends of the Isle of Wight, first published in 1839, takes the form of a road trip around the island by the author and his sidekick, Mr Winterblossom, an antiquary well versed in the lore of the island and related by him to the author, as well as by others encountered aling the way, in the course of their journey.

The tale of how the church at Godshill came to built be on top of the hill there is not included in the book, but an account of that story was published by the author in Bentley’s Miscellany Vol. VI., p255-262, 1839, in an article entitled Legends of the Isle of Wight, with the adventures of the author in search of them, by Abraham Elder, Esq., starting at page 253.

Abraham Elder’s “Legends of the Isle of Wight: Godshill”, in Bentley’s Miscellany, 1839

GODSHILL.

Having received a letter from Captain Nosered, of Violet Cottage, Ventnor, containing an invitation for Mr. Winterblossom and myself to spend the day with him, stating at the same time that he had a tale for me connected with that neighbourhood, very curious, and well-authenticated, which he wished to show me ; as the captain was an old friend of mine, we accepted the invitation, and set out in a car together the next day.

“ Pray, sir,” said I, as we went along, “ what is that church that I see yonder perched up at the top of a hill ?”

“ Godshill,” answered the antiquary.

“ Godshill ! Pray can you inform me how it got that name ? It cannot be because it is nearer to heaven than the country round it.”

“ I certainly never heard that reason for it before. I always understood that it had been named Godshill in commemoration of a miracle that tradition tells us was performed at the building of the church. The story, as it is now told, and by many still believed, in the Isle of Wight, is as follows : —

“ A sum of money having been given by certain pious individuals, whose names unfortunately are now lost, for the erection of a church, the religious authorities of the Island, under whose direction it was to be erected, looked out for a proper site for it. After mature deliberation, they fixed upon a spot at the foot of the steep eminence upon which the present church stands.

“ Having arranged this to their own satisfaction, they sent a messenger to the proprietor of the land, informing him that the Bishop of the Isle of Wight, after a solemn consultation with a council composed of ancient and holy men, having at heart the spiritual welfare of his island flock, had at length decided upon conferring upon him the high honour and distinction of allowing the church to be built upon his land ; and he begged him moreover not to be puffed up with pride thereat, but to receive the favour thus conferred upon him with all humility and gratitude.

“ Now it so happened that the owner of this land was a poor franklin (a freeholder), of very limited means and a very large family, and moreover he was by no means of a religious turn of mind. In his heart he hated all priests and monks ; he went to sleep at mass when he did attend it ; fast-day and feast were to him alike ; and as for confession, he avoided it altogether, — not because he had nothing to confess, but because he was afraid of frightening the priest if he told the truth ; and where was the good of confession if he told lies.

“ There were, however, occasional exceptions to this rule. There was a certain jolly wandering friar, who used to visit him occasionally and shrive him, without being too particular about trifles ; and, besides, he used to hear his confession after supper, which tended to make it pass off very smoothly. Once, indeed, the friar ordered him a slight penance ; but then upon that visit he found his landlord’s ale a little turned, which might in some degree have soured his temper. The franklin used to say, that a simmering mug of ale, with a roasted crab bobbing about in it, would get him absolution from any sin in the world.

“ This being the character of the man who owned the land, it may easily be imagined that, although he avoided the first evil of being conferred upon him with all the humility and gratitude required of him.

“ He did not, however, dare to fly in the face of his powerful self-styled benefactors. He hemmed, and hawed, and coughed, and then remarked what a splendid site for the church there was just at the top of the hill.

“ He was informed that that situation had been well considered, and it was thought to be too much exposed.

“ The franklin then changed his tone, and, looking down to the ground with a well-feigned humility, he said to the monk —

“ ‘Father, the fact is, I am a very great sinner ; and if the church is built upon land belonging to me, it will be erected upon unholy ground. I pray you, father, consider this well. My neighbours on both sides are pious persons, and their land contains magnificent sites for building churches. If you build your church upon their land, it will not stand upon unholy ground ; and the high honour will be conferred upon a pious person, who is worthy to be distinguished by the favour, of the bishop and his reverend council.’

“ The monk replied, ‘ Your being a sinner is no obstacle, but the reverse ; for, when the foundation stone is laid, you will receive absolution for all your sins, be they ever so black ; and as for the land being tainted with unholiness, we can consecrate that.’

“ The franklin was now sorely puzzled what to say. He mattered something about the largeness of his family and the smallness of his farm, and how the spot fixed upon was the best bit of the whole, and how he might be reduced to poverty.

“ The monk, however, turned a deaf ear to all this, affecting either not to hear or not to understand the drift of his argument ; and so, without in the least committing himself by any hint about the possibility of compensation, he hied him back to his masters, and told them how, when he had delivered his message, the franklin bent his eyes with all humility towards the ground, and replied, that he was too great a sinner for so high an honour to be conferred upon him.

“ In the due course of time the bishop’s architect came to survey the spot, and trace out the lines of the foundation, and some stones from the quarry at Binstead were piled in a heap, ready for the commencement of the building. The next morning the architect and the masons made their appearance. How great was their astonishment to find not a single stone remaining where they had placed it, and not a single peg or mark put in by the architect remaining there!

“ They stood here for some time, first staring at the bare field, then looking at one another, and then staring at the ground again.

“ ‘Where are all the buildng stones gone to?’ said one.

“ ‘Where are all my pegs that marked out the lines of the foundation ?’ said the architect.

“ Where are all the stones and the pegs gone to, Master Franklin ? What tricks have you been playing us, Master Franklin ?’ said one of them to the owner of the field.

“ The franklin looked innocence itself, then opened his eyes and his mouth, and raised up his hands in mute astonishment.

“ ‘It strikes me’ said one of the labourers, scratching his head, ‘that we most just have mistaken our way, and come to the wrong field.’

“ That’s quite impossible !’ said two or three of the others, speaking together.

“ While they were thus debating, the owner of the land at the top of the hill made his appearance among them.

“ ‘ Is this fair ? – is this right ? — is this honourable ?’ said he.

“ ‘ What fair?— what right?’ rejoined the architect. ‘ We do not understand you.’

“ ‘ I know well,’ said the man from the top of the hill, ‘ that land is oftentimes seized to erect a church upon, without compensation being given to the owner ; but I ask you, is it not hard, very hard, that the foundations of a church should be pegged out, and the stones placed ready for the builder, upon my land, without my being told a word about it beforehand ? Sir, I honour the priesthood and holy men as a good man ought ; but not when they come like a thief in the night to plunder me of my patrimony. Fie ! fie ! Master Architect. What ! — must you come in the night, while I am asleep, to mark out your foundations, and place your building-stones all ready to begin with ? Why, if I had overslept myself, I might almost have found when I awoke my best field converted into buildings and churchyards.’

“ What can the man mean ?’ said the architect, when the little man from the top of the hill stopped to take breath.

“ Why, it is just what I thought,’ said one of the masons ; ‘ there must be two fields somehow or other so exactly alike, that we must have mistaken the one for the other.’

“ ‘ I can assure you,’ said our friend the franklin, putting in his word, ‘ that, although he appears a little excited at present, he is a very sensible, respectable, pious man ; but what he is talking about I cannot imagine.’

“‘Look up there,’ said the little man from the top of the hill ;. ‘ there they have already brought stones to commence a church with, and have actually begun to mark out the direction of the foundations.’

“ In consequence, everybody did look up in the direction he pointed, and certainly they did perceive the tops of two heaps of stones showing themselves above the brow of the hill. The architect and his assistants immediately directed their steps there, and, to their great astonishment, they found the building-stones disposed in much the same order on the top of the hill that they had placed them in the field below.

“ What was to be done ? The bishop had arranged that he should come that very afternoon to lay the first stone of the church himself. There was, therefore, no time to be lost ; so, without speculating further how the stones had contrived to get up to the top of a steep hill without assistance, they set themselves to work in good earnest to bring them down again ; and before the appointed time for the bishop’s arrival the stones were all heaped up as they were before, the architect had pegged out the shape of the new church, and a little part of the foundation had been dug, ready to receive the first stone.

“ Shortly after the hour at which the bishop was expected, a group of monks and other ecclesiastics were seen collectad together in the distance waiting for him. After the lapse of about twenty minutes, the dignitary himself riding on a mule, attended by about six or seven mounted attendants, joined their inferior brethren, who were awaiting him. They now formed themselves into a procession, walking two and two, those on foot marching first, then the bishop ; his mounted companions followed two and two, and a few more attendants on foot brought up the rear.

“ As they advanced at a slow pace, they chanted a psalm. One half of them chanted the first verse, the other half replied to them in a higher note, while here and there their united voices swelled into a loud chorus.

“ The workmen and the peasantry, who were assembled round the destined site of the new church, listened with deep devotion to the solemn notes of the holy song, now swelling loud, now dying away upon the summer wind.

“ When the procession arrived at the spot, the monks on foot filed to the right and to the left, still raising their voices, and turning up their eyes towards heaven. The bishop on his mule now arrived in front, and it was expected that he would dismount and offer up a prayer for the success of their undertaking. Had he been on foot, there is no doubt but that he would have done so ; but mules are animals proverbially obstinate, delighting in showing that they have a will of their own, independent of their master’s. So was it in the present instance; for the animal, instead of stopping short, as he was directed to do, continued to walk leisurely on, till at length he quickened his pace into a trot, and he had actually ascended half way up the steep hill in front before he could be brought to a full stop. At length the bishop returned crestfallen and out of humour, and having taken his appointed place, he commenced his prayer for the success of the undertaking, resting his knee upon an embroidered footstool, while the rest of the congregation knelt upon the ground. After his prayer was concluded, some masonic tools and a small silver coin were given to him. He now, with the assistance of two masons, deposited the coin, and settled down the stone upon it. They chanted a psalm ; and when this was concluded, the bishop’s attendant deacon called for the franklin by name. When he had come, the bishop said, ‘Kneel down.’

“ The franklin knelt.

“ The bishop then, after praising him for his piety, pronounced a full absolution for all his sins, and all the ecclesiastics responded in a deep ‘ Amen.’ The bishop then gave the whole assembly bis parting benediction, and the ceremony was at an end.

“ As the venerable fathers rode home together, they discussed and rediscussed, and commented upon the curious tale of which they had heard several versions that morning ; how all the building-stones, together with the architect’s markers and pegs, had been mysteriously conveyed away from their allotted spot to the top of a steep hill in the neighbourhood. It could not have been chance. If the stones had rolled from the top of the hill down to the bottom, it would have been another thing ; but stones cannot roll up a hill.

“ Was it a miracle ? Catholic priests in all ages of the world are supposed to be oftener preachers than believers of the miracles that take place under their own eyes ; so, though the possibility of its having been a miracle was thrown out once or twice, the majority were decidedly against the opinion that a miracle had been worked in the present instance.

“ Then there was a third supposition. It might have been a trick played upon them by some base reprobate. This appeared to them all to be much more unlikely than either of the two foregoing suppositions. Where could a man be found so utterly wicked as to wish to do such an action ? Certainly not in the Isle of Wight, so celebrated for its piety. But even suppose such a man was found, how was it possible to imagine for a moment that he would dare to do it ? The church can excommuuicate as well as bless; besides, people had been burnt alive for sacrilege before ; then what object could any person possibly have in doing so ? It certainly could not be merely for the sake of running the chance of being burnt alive, with the addition of the curses of the church, and the execration of all mankind. Then, again, how could he possibly carry his intentions into execution, even if he was mad enough to desire it ? It could have been no light labour to have carried all the stones up the hill ; and it was evidently quite impossible to have done it without being observed by some of the neighbours ; and what neighbour would dare to conceal such an action from the Holy Church ?

“ At length one of the brothers interrupted this discussion, saying, in a most solemn tone,

“ ‘ In the blindness of your hearts, and in the eagerness of your talking, yon have altogether forgotten the most important fact of all.’

“ ‘What is that ?’ demanded two or three at once.

“ ‘Had it not been for the assistance of two strong men in stopping his mule, the bishop himself would have been carried up to the top of the hill.’

“ It would never have done for the other ecclesiastics to have cast any reflections upon the horsemanship of their superior ; so it was absolutely necessary for them all to come to the conclusion that there was something very supernatural and wonderful in the whole affiiir. Thus ostensibly, at any rate, the theory of the miracle carried it hollow.

“ The bishop, however, between whom and the mule similar differences of opinion, attended with precisely the same results, had frequently occurred before, could not in his heart subscribe to the proof that appeared to have convinced the rest ; so he thus addressed his attendants.

“ Brethren, however singular may have appeared whhat we have heard and seen this day, we ought not lightly to adopt an opinion that anything has occurred out of the common order of nature, lest other causes, simple and obvious to the unlearned, should by chance be brought to light, sufficient to account for what has happened, and thus the authority of the Church be brought into jeopardy. I will therefore order two men to be placed to watch the spot to-night, and to-morrow we will discuss this matter again, after they should have made their report.’

“ One of his attendants was in consequence sent back to direct two of the workmen to remain on the spot all night, and to give them his blessing, which was accordingly done.

“ A messenger from the bishop was sent to them again in the morning, to see whether all had remained quiet during the night. The account that he brought beck was, that he found the two men lying upon the ground in a helpless state, like men weary in body and opprataed with strong drink. He roused them with some trouble, and they then gave a very strange and marvellous account of what they had seen and heard during the night.

“ The most extraordinary fact, however, that the messenger had to report was, that the stones had all contrived to get up to the top of this hill again; the foundation-stone had been taken away, and the trench filled up, and the turf laid smooth again.

“ Upon ascending the hill, they found the building-stones bestowed in the same form they were the morning before ; the lines of the foundation were in the same manner pegged out by the architect’s marks ; a small portion of the foundation had been dug, and the first stone had been laid, — the identical first stone that had been laid by the bisbop in another place the evening before.

“ The bishop, upon hearing this, ordered the two watchers and all the other persons who had been employed the day previous to be brought before him. The account that the two watchers gave was, that about midnight they were startled by a low rumbling noise, which appeared to issue from the heaps of stones. Presently the stones were observed to move, rolling about one against another, just as if there was a large body movine about and kicking in the midst of the heap ; then a little stone rolled off the top of the heap, and tumbled on the ground ; but it quite made their hair stand on end to see that, instead of stopping there, it kept on rolling and rolling, -where the ground was rough it hopped and skipped, and then went on rolling again in the direction of the hill. Then out came another stone, and rolled, and skipped, and rolled like the first. In a little time, when the stones had contrived to shake themselves out of the heap, where they seemed to be very much in one another’s way, they all began rollng away together, — the little ones going faster and more nimbly than the others. The watchers said that they had some difficulty in getting out of the way, there were so many of them on the move together. A large stone, indeed, did come foul of one of them, hit him on the shin, and knocked him out of the way, nearly breaking his leg, and then went bowling on, as if it did not care whether his leg was broken or not.

“ When the stones had all gone by, they determined, though they were very much frightened at the time, to follow them, and see what they would do. They overtook them at a steep pitch of the hill, which appeared to offer considerable hindrance to their ascent The little ones, indeed, were seen scrambling up without any great great difficulty ; but the large heavy ones coukl hardly get on at all. Some of them rolled half way over, and then rolled back again, but, afler one or two efforts, they generally got a roll in advance ; and when they passed the steep pitch, they bowled away again merrily.

“ The watchers waited until they had all passed the difficulty except one large stone, with a very awkward angle sticking out of its side, which seemed effectually to prevent its turning over at all. It contrived to turn half way over, and then rolled back again, and this it had repeated so often, that it had actually worked itself into a hole, and all its efforts to extricate iteelf seemed hopeless.

“ The watchers consulted with one another whether it would not be an act of charity to lend the poor stone a hand, and then they knelt down and put their shoulders against its under side and gave a heave. The great awkward stone rolled over, and then kept scrambling on as if it had been just as well made as the rest of its companions.

“ They followed the stones to the top of the hill to watch their proceedings there. The stones in several places were seen huddling themselves close together, and there were some others rolled up to them, and gave one hop, and jumped on to the top of them, till at leagth there were seen piled up in just such heaps as they lay in before down below. Then the pegs — the architect’s pegs were hopping about upon the ground like sparrows ; but their wooden heads did not seem to be half so sharp-witted as the stones, for they seemed sorely puzzled where to place themselves, notwithstanding the apparent exertions of a tall wand, with a bit of coloured rag at the top of it, which kept constantly moving backward and forward, now sticking himself in at one corner, and then at another, probably much in dthe same way that it had previously done under the architect’s directions. But long before they had made their arrangements to anything like their own satisfaction, up hopped a spade, which banged across the ground they were marking, knocking down two or three pegs in his way without any ceremony, and began sedulously digging and throwing out the earth. It was marvellous to see how it crammed itself into the ground, and then threw out the earth, without any hand or foot to guide it.

“When it had dug a hole sufficiently large, up rolled a large flat stone, and squatted itself down in it. The stone was afterwards found to be the same identical stone that had been laid by the bishop with so much ceremony down below.

“ This was the account given by the two men who had been set to watch.

“ One of the other men employed now stepped forward, and said, that with regard to the bad hurt that one of the watchers had got upon his shin, he was quite certain that his companion had not received that hurt up to late in the evening before. They always worked with bare legs, and he must therefore have seen it.

“ Here the bishop and his council put their heads together, and consulted a little in an under tone. It was evident that the man had received his hurt some time during the night, and not during his work hours ; and it was quite incredible that he could purposely have inflicted such an injury upon himself. This was a strong piece of circumstantial evidence, and went far to prove the truth of the story. Then the account given by these two men agreed so exactly in every particular, — they were so accurate in the description of every minute circumstance, — all the different parts of the story fitted so well together, that they considered it unnecessary to hear any farther evidence upon the subject The bishop then dismissed the assembly.

“ Two days after this the bishop, attended by the principal ecclesiastics and the chief inhabitants of the Isle of Wight, went in solemn procession to consecrate the new site of the church. The ceremony was very similar to the preceding one, except that the bishop recited at great length, and with some trifling alterations and additions, the wonderful miracle that had taken place upon the spot. After he had concluded his address, they raised the foundation-stone to see whether the piece of money was still lying under it.

“ Great was the astonishment of all the assembly to find that it was gone, and exactly in the spot where it should have been was found the paring of a thumb-nail As soon as this was publicly announced, a loud and universal shout arose — ‘ A relic ! a holy relic ! ‘ I pass over altogether, for it would be grating to the ear of every religious Protestant, the consultations that were held upon the subject, the processions that followed, the masses that were said, the adorations that were paid to this trumpery and filthy object. It is sufficient to know that the site was consecrated, the church was built, and the ground upon which it was erected has ever since been known by the name of God’s-hill.

“ The franklin was highly pleased to have had all his sins absolved by the bishop himself, without the necessity of any confession ; while his cows still ranged over his favourite field ; and the two watchers never passed that way without partaking of the best cheer that the franklin could set before them.”

Barber’s Picturesque Illustrations of the Isle of Wight, published in 1850, describes how “[r]ustic tradition tells that a more lowly spot was first selected for the erection of the church; but that the materials employed for that purpose, day by day, being regularly removed by invisible agents to the summit of the hill during the night, the workmen at length wisely determined to save themselves further unnecessary trouble, and built the church where some supernatural authority so plainly intimated that it must be erected.

A slightly more religious telling is provided in “The Isle of Wight” by George Clinch, published in 1908, quoting an “ancient legend which is thus given in a local guide-book”:

The people of this village, having long lived in pagan darkness, were at length visited by a holy man who came and lived among them. He told the wondrous story of Divine self-sacrifice, and taught the Catholic religion of love and mercy. This so touched the hearts of the people that they cast down their blood-stained altars and acknowledged the true God.

Then cried the elders of the village: “We will build a temple to His honour, where we and our children’s children may worship, and by which generations yet unborn may know how the Saxon reverenced God.”

They chose, therefore, a level place, and all day long they wrought and toiled, and when night came they rested from their labours. But on the morrow, when borne during the night by invisible hands to the top of a round knoll.

When the people saw this marvellous sight they cried with one voice: “Let us build now on the top of the hill, for this must be the will of God,” and from that time the church and village have been known as Godshill in memory of this great deed.

Clinch goes on to describe how [t]his legend, which may have been invented in explanation of a rather remarkable name, belongs to a class of which numerous examples still linger in England”:

Usually one finds them in places where the parish church stands at a considerable distance from the village, and, generally, they are to the effect that the building erected in or near the village during the day-time was conveyed by evil influences to a remote situation at night. The Godshill legend is a variant of this group.

And a Poetic Telling…

In Legends and Lays of the Wight first published in 1912, Percy G. Stone lifts the summary of the legend of Godshill from Barber’s Picturesque Illustrations of the Isle of Wight, before retelling the tale more colourfully in verse:

They had gathered them in from the countryside round
To settle a serious matter.
The question was this: They sore needed a church
But they seemed very like to be left in the lurch,
And the whole thing to finish in chatter.

Shall we build it up there on the top of the down,
Or here in the valley below?
As at all parish meetings, a number said Aye
The hill is the spot for it’s open and high,
While the rest called them fools, and said No.

And while they thus argued for valley or hill
In the weary parochial way.
The Devil drew near, in the guise of a Friar
— The Devil is always a plausible liar —
And put in his word for the Nay.

‘Why burden yourself with the onerous task
Of building up there on the height?
The carriage of stone will entail a sad toil,
So listen to me, honest sons of the soil.
Below’s the most practical site.’

‘The holy monk’s right,’ shouted those who agreed
To the vale scheme. Beelzebub lied.
As he always can do, with such hearty good will
That most of the folk who’d declared for the hill
Turned about and came over his side.

Satan reckoned, if tucked away snug out of sight,
‘Twould be more out of mind of the Saints.’
Besides, with the muddy and waltorish ways,
They would sure be more likely to curse than to praise —
Thus their prayers would get choked with complaints.

St. Boniface, passing, soon saw what was on,
So put in his vote for the hill.
Don’t listen to fossils like him —
Slaves to orthodox precedent, crotchet and whim —
Quoth Satan, ‘Tis clear, friends, his knowledge is nil.’

So to it they went with a hearty good will.’
Said the Saint, ‘It is just as I feared:
Though the fools wouldn’t listen to what I’d to say,
Beelzebub shan’t have it all his own way’
And he thoughtfully pulled at his beard.

So the masons hewed stones and then set them in place,
Chipping hard till the daylight had sped.
Then gathering their tools, with a sigh of content
At the work they had done, gaily homewards they went
To supper, and after to bed.

Next morning betimes they arose with the lark
And set forth to work with a will.
But lo! when they got there, ‘twas level with ground.
— Not a sign of a stone to be anywhere found
They were all laid atop of the hill.

‘Here, bother it all!’ the head mason exclaimed
‘Who’s been playing the fool with this job?’
‘If I catch him, mark well’ — and he doubled his fist,
With a look that I wouldn’t for money have missed,
“I’ll trounce him right soundly begob!”

His comrades, sore puzzled, looked up and looked down,
Then exclaimed with unanimous voice
— They knew nothing about it so strike ‘em all dead
As after their suppers they went straight to bed,
And had naturally stayed there, for choice.

So it’s up to the top of the hill they must toil
And fetch all those stones down again.
While they swore at the fool who had played them the trick
— Of course the first person they thought of was Nick —
And given them toiling in vain.

Once again in their places the pieces secured,
They mortared them surely and true.
But when morning dawn lightened, the stones as before
— Whereat the whole company lustily swore
Were ranged on the hill-top anew.

Said the stout master mason, a-scratching his head,
‘This is getting too much of a jest;
Let alone double toil, it will never get done:
‘Tis the job of a lifetime for every one:
From our labour we never shall rest.’

When the very next morning the same thing occurred.
‘Stop, mates : let it be. The whole thing’s
A puzzle too tough for my nob;
The Building Committee must settle this job:
It’s a bit too perplexing for me.’

So they called them together and met once again
And argued it worse than before.
They argued it up and they argued it down,
Like the council elect of a small county town,
Till they argued their very throats sore.

Then Boniface Saint he laughed low in his beard:
“‘Tis Isle of Wight calves that you be.
Are your heads then so thick that you can’t understand
When from Heaven you’re graciously sent a command —
It ‘s a miracle, easy to see.”

‘You scorned the advice of a credited saint’
— Here his stature a full cubit rose —
‘Who was never convicted of being a liar,
And hung on the words of this sham shaven friar,
Who led all you fools by the nose.’

“A friar forsooth! ‘Neath his cowl and his frock
Horns and hooves I can clearly perceive.
— This has been one of your narrowest shaves ±
Come hither, Beelzebub, subtlest of knaves,
And your recompense duly receive.”

Saint Boniface here gripped him tight by the neck,
“With, None of your sly monkey tricks”
Then, catching him fair with the point of his toe,
He lifted the Devil a furlong or so
With a couple of right lusty kicks.

Whereat the parishioners fell on their knees
And lauded the Saint to the sky.
So Boniface blessed them in orthodox way.
Then, looking around him, proceeded to say,
‘This humility’s mostly my eye.

‘Next time don’t be led by a plausible rogue
Unknown to the Parish and you
Though I’ve heard it, my friends, reprehensibly said
By Christians, alas! who are easily led,
We must render the Devil his due.

‘Avoid mendicant friars, and take this advice
I tender you ere I depart:
Don’t argue it more. Work away with a will
At building your church on the top of the hill,
Every man of you bearing his part.’

‘We assure you, good Saint, we will do as you say.
But, ere that you bid us adieu,
Grant this favour benign, that our newly-built church
— By Beelzebub’s guile nearly left in the lurch —
May be titled in honour of you.’

“Though I’m flattered, the honour I needs must decline
— Besides I’m bespoken elsewhere
When everything’s finished, to carving and paint,
Let your church be invoked in the name of each saint
By whom you’re accustomed to swear.”

All humbly they cried, ‘It shall be as you wish.
Your Saintship; we’11 work with a will
And the site where the building in future will stand,
According to God’s and your saintly command,
Shall be known by the name of GODSHILL.’

The church there to-day on the top of the mound
Lifts its pinnacled Tower to sky
While a mile to the South Devil’s Acre is found
— Which maids in the dark are afraid to pass round —
Two proofs to you Legends don’t lie.

Isle of Wight calves: a local expression for a dull-witted man.

A Warning to Lewd Women

Over the years, the church was rebuilt - the current church was perhaps started in the early 1400s, with the top part of the tower being rebuilt in the 16th century and later repaired following a lightning strike of 1778 - and the Church became a regular stopping off point for tourists and visitors alike, though perhaps today’s visitors prefer the tea rooms and the chocolate shop and the model village to the Church.

If you do go up to the Church, and look on the noticeboards, you’re as likely as not to see a poster for a flower festival, or a jumble sale, perhaps, as well as sundry other church notices.

But for one visitor, John Hassell, writing in volume two of his two volume work, Tour of the Isle of Wight, published in 1790, and which you can find nowadays via Google Books, there was something rather more unusual posted there. After noting damage to two of the gable ends resulting from the 1178 lightning strike, Hassell recounts his experience of entering the Church (p.88): [u]pon our entering the porch we observed abstracts from several acts of parliament fixed against the door, and among them one that excited both our curiosity and risibility;

— it was from an act made in the seventh of James the First, which enacts, that every female who unfortunately intrudes on the parish a second illegitimate child, shall be liable to imprisonment and hard labour in Bridewell for six months.

Now as the number of females on this island much exceeds that of the males; and as, from the mild temperature of the climate, circumstances frequently arise among the lower ranks that render the intention of this act of no effect; we could not help thinking this public exhibition of the abstract as rather a rigorous exertion of Justice.

We found it was not very unusual here for the young men, from the deficiency of numbers just spoken of, to pay their devoirs to more than one young woman at a time; and as it is not possible for him legally to unite himself to all of them, he generally bestows his hand on her who had first presented him with a pledge of their love.

This, however, is seldom done till the approach of a second pledge from the same person renders such an act of compassion needful, in order to avoid the consequences of the tremendous anathema fixed on the church door.

A little digging turns up the act that Hassell was perhaps referring to, although in actual terms it seems far more draconian even than Hassell decscribed:

Volume VII

Fourth session of Parliament, February 9th, 1609 CAP.IV A act for the due execution of divers laws and statutes heretofore made against rogues, vagabonds and sturdy beggars and other lewd and idle persons.

Paragraph VII. And because great charge ariseth upon many places within this realm by reason of bastardy besides the great dishonour of Almighty God, be it therefore enacted by the authority aforesaid. That every lewd Woman, which after this present session of parliament shall have any bastard which may be chargeable to the parish, the justices of peace shall commit such lewd woman to the house of correction, there to be punished and set on work, during the term of one whole year ; (2) and if she shall estsoons offend again. That then to be committed to the said house of correction as aforesaid, and there to remain until she can put in good sureties for her good behaviour, not to offend so again.

The act also goes on in more general terms:

Paragraph VIII. And for that many wilful people finding that they having children, have some hope to have relief from the parish wherein they dwell and being able to labour and thereby to relieve themselves and their families do nevertheless run away out of their parishes and leave a remedy for their families upon the parish; (2) for remedy whereof, be it further enacted by this present parliament, and the authority of the same, That all such persons so running away shall be taken and deemed to be incorrigible rogues, and endure the pain of incorrigible rogues; 3) and if either such man or woman being able to work, and shall threaten to run away and leave their families as aforesaid, the same being proved by two sufficient witnesses upon oath before two justices of peace in that division ; that then the said persons so threatening shall by the said justices of peace be sent to the house of correction (unless he or she can put in sufficient sureties for the discharge of the parish) there to be dealt with and detained as a sturdy and wandring rogue, and to be delivered at the said assembly or meeting, or at the quarter-sessions, and not otherwise.

It is also worth noting that the earlier paragraph II required the construction of a house of correction in each county, where not already available, by justices of the peace:

Paragraph II
That before the feast of Saint Michael the archangel which shall be in the year of our Lord Cod one thousand six hundred and eleven there shall be erected, built or otherwise provided, within every county of this realm of England and Wales where there is not one house of correction already built, purchased, provided or continued, one or more fit and convenient house or houses of correction, with convenient backside thereunto adjoining, together with mills, turns, cards and suchlike necessary implements, to set the said rogues or such other idle persons on work; the same houses to be built, erected or provided in some convenient place or town in every county : (2) which houses shall be purchased, conveyed or assured unto such person or persons as by the justices of peace or the more part of them, in their quarter sessions of the peace to be holden within every county of this realm of England and Wales, upon trust, to the intent the same shall be used and imployed for the keeping, correcting and letting to work of the said rogues, vagabonds, sturdy beggars and other idle and disorderly persons.

For any counties not meeting the requirement, a financial penalty would ensue:

Paragraph III. And be it further enacted by the authority aforesaid, That if the said house so to be erected, purchased or provided, shall not be erected, built or otherwise provided before the feast of Saint Michael the archangel, which shall be in the year one thousand fix hundred and eleven next ensuing the last day of this present session parliament. That then every justice of peace within every county of this realm of England and Wales where such house and backside shall not be erected or provided, shall forfeit for his said neglect, five pounds of lawful English money; 2) the one moiety thereof to be unto him or them that will sue for the same by action of debt, bill, plaint or information; in which suit no protection, essoin or wager of law shall be admitted ; and the other moiety thereof to be employed and bestowed towards the creating, building, procuring or providing the said house and backside, and such necessary implements as aforesaid.

But what of Bridewell, as mentioned by Hassell?

TO DO

https://www.londonlives.org/static/Bridewell.jsp Bridewell Prison and Hospital was established in a former royal palace in 1553 with two purposes: the punishment of the disorderly poor and housing of homeless children in the City of London. Located on the banks of the Fleet River in the City, it was both the first house of correction in the country and a major charitable institution (reflecting the early modern definition of a “hospital”). Its records provide valuable evidence of both petty crime and pauper apprenticeships in the eighteenth century.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bridewell_Palace Bridewell Palace in London was built as a residence of King Henry VIII and was one of his homes early in his reign for eight years. Given to the City of London Corporation by his son King Edward VI for use as an orphanage and place of correction for wayward women

See also: _missed_opportunities_pre_1830.md for more on Madam Cresswell

For the traditional author of written works, the story, as much as the published work, whether a printed book, a digital e-book, an audio book or even just an extract in a Sunday supplement, is often something to be protected, something that remains under the ownership of the author to license and “perform” as they see fit.

For the traditional storyteller, the product is the performance. The stories are passed on, free to be retold by those who heard them, under common, public ownership. Many stories told by traditional storytellers do get written down, at some point, of course. And more stories told by storytellers may have been “picked up” from written down story collections.

For the traditional bookseller, it helps to have a physical product to sell, rather than just an event.

two different ways. The first way is a “literary” way, a reprinting of two long since out of copyright tales originally published in the late 1830s by a certain Mr Abraham Elder (a brief appendix starts to explore just who who the real person behind that pen name really was). Elder’s tales are presented as if they were collected, but they owe as much, if not more, to the creative imagination of the teller as the presumed oral tales they claim to retell. The second way is my way, at least for now, based on a “pre-transcript” of tales I have told as part of the Island Tales set presented by ‘Tis Tales at Ventnor Fringe, and elsewhere. These retellings are a window into some of the homework that goes in as I try to find my own way through a story.